Saturday, February 20, 2010

Disgruntled...

So work has become really weird. We're in the process of a takeover and rumors abound (of course), but beyond that...we got a 483. Well, one group in our division got a 483; not my group (huge sigh of relief). For those of you who don't work in the pharmaceutical industry, a 483 is an FDA form that's used to report compliance issues after an on site inspection. It's a big deal to get one, and at the moment, management is understandably upset about it, as a result of which everyone in our department was invited to a MANDATORY (yep, the subject line in the email was all in caps like that, and attendance was taken) spontaneous meeting last Wednesday to listen to a very bizarre lecture by our division VP that began with how embarrassing it was to have this happen and then segued into a rambling digression about how even thieves have values, and how a bank robber with a gun who hugs the teller will always get caught because he's not clear on his values; he's conflicted...

I confess the VP who delivered this little gem of a lecture sort of lost me there, because I was wondering what on earth robbing banks has to do with compliance issues, but then it got even more weird, and threatening. The VP said he knows who each and everyone of us is and if he sees us walking around looking happy, then he knows that we're not doing our jobs, because we should not look happy at work, and if we're walking slowly he knows we're not doing our jobs, because there is work to be done, yada yada yada. Uh-huh. Sitting there listening to this very unpleasant lecture, I consoled myself with the thought that after making Fortune Magazine's "One of the 100 best companies to work for" list every year for over 10 years, the company didn't make it to the list this year.

And I also thought about the bozo in our little group who is out at least one day a week, week in and week out; who, despite the fact that we're swamped with work, stayed home a couple of weeks ago to celebrate his dog's birthday; and who was at work for a total of maybe 9 hours this week. Most of the time when he's out he just no-shows. On two of the days he was out this week, he was seen sitting in his truck in the parking lot, the engine running, early in the morning, after which he turned around and left. On one of those days he called our boss, and said he was sitting in his truck in the parking lot "but y'all don't wanna be around me today so I'm goin' home". When my boss told me this (she thought it was funny) I said, "Shoot, we don't want to be around him every day; why doesn't he get the message and just stay home?" If any of the rest of us did this, we'd get fired, but he's apparently bullet proof. In spite of the fact that has absolutely no work ethic, he's several pay grades above most of us, which means in addition to being paid more, he gets stock options and bonuses. Did I mention that his Daddy was big man in the company several years ago? Which is why he gets by with this stuff. Although he's closer to 50 than to any other birthday, he always refers to his father as Daddy, and he spends a lot of time talking about Daddy.

He missed the mandatory meeting (of course). But he walks fast and looks unhappy and he's clear on his values: he doesn't want to be there. I guess that means he'll continue to survive...

8 comments:

Mrs. L said...

So how soon will this novel 'based on a true story' be finished? I smell movie rights. Maybe Matt Damon can play the guy in the truck who calls his papa "Daddy." I think Meryl Streep for your part.

emmapeelDallas said...

Ah, Mrs. L...just when I was feeling some remorse for posting this public lament, you comment and leave me laughing...

thank you.

Chris said...

Maybe you could convince him to do the idling truck bit at home.....in his garage;)

(And take the VP with him)

emmapeelDallas said...

That's a great suggestion, Chris...and I especially like the idea of his taking the VP with him...

Lisa :-] said...

I wish I could think of some clever comment...but I think that between this post and the earlier one where you wondered what you were doing in Texas, maybe the hand is writing on that wall...

Erin said...

I can't believe they told you that you should not look happy at work. What exactly are they going for here? A discontented, miserable workforce? Well, it sounds like they're going to get one with speeches like that! I'm so sorry, but I'm glad you are (as always) keeping a sense of humor

emmapeelDallas said...

It gets worse. Last week I found out that two of my colleagues got long overdue, very much deserved, promotions, FINALLY. I was truly happy for both of them, and congratulated each of them. This morning I found out that the VP who gave the "don't walk around looking happy" speech pulled the promotion for one of the guys, because that guy happens to work in the group that got the 483. I am grateful to have a job, but it is so not fun to work for a tyrant.

Erin said...

There are no take-backs in promotions! Ridiculous.