hope is the thing with feathers...

I'm going to VA at the end of this month to spend a week with Ali and Chris and Wiggle. Ticket is PURCHASED! Woo hoo!

Oh, HAPPY DAY!

Isn't this a fabulous pic? It's my son-in-law, Chris, proudly holding Wiggle and relaxing with a beer (well, no beer for Wiggle) at the venerable Jimmy's in Hyde Park shortly after successfully defending his dissertation at the University of Chicago.

Woo hoo! Way to go, Chris!

This means, in addition to being

• a TERRIFIC son-in-law
• a WONDERFUL son
• a DEVOTED brother
• a FANTASTIC brother-in-law
• a LOVING husband
• and a DOTING Dad
  

We can now officially call you DOCTOR!

CONGRATULATIONS! You're the BEST!

Happiness is...

spending time with a sunny little boy...

Summer Solstice 2010

I'm in Chicago watching Wiggle while his parents look for housing in Virginia. Not quite 17 months old, he's a total sweetheart. He's so sunny in the morning when he wakes, and he stays sunny all day long. I'm sleeping on a futon in his room, and I hear him talking to himself cheerfully the moment he wakes up, like a little bird, and the moment I roll over and he sees that I'm awake he smiles and gets to his feet in his crib and says brightly, "UP UP UP!" Of course I get up and pick him up. Then I change his diaper and we go out into the apartment for breakfast. While my cup of coffee is brewing he has a banana and a cup of milk, and he chatters away happily as he eats.

Today we read books, worked on puzzles, played games, watered plants, blew bubbles and drew, letters and objects and shapes. We went to the store twice, and he was terrific both times. This afternoon when we got home he ran into the apartment and looked around, and I know he was looking for Alex and Chris, but when he saw that they weren't there he accepted it and looked to me to get his dinner, which of course I did. He was a little reluctant to have his bath tonight, but I'm quite sure that's because he'd figured out that if I gave him his bath, the only reason for that is that his parents weren't here to do it. So he had a very quick bath; really just a rinse off. He didn't want to play, and he usually loves to play in his bath, but I think he was especially missing his mom and dad when it came time to have his bath, because that's part of his usual bedtime routine with them. He didn't want me to read any stories to him, either, although he relented and had me read Where The Wild Things Are a couple of times. We did a couple of puzzles before I put him to bed, then I started his music and leaned over his crib and rubbed his back for half an hour while he listened to Leonard Cohen songs. When I left his room he cried for a couple of minutes before he fell asleep.

All of which has left me reflecting, and I've decided that I'm amazed and humbled to be in the presence of Wiggle. He's too young to have any real sense of time, and also too young to ask or understand where his parents are, and when they'll be back. I know he must miss them terribly, and yet he's cheerful and makes the best of the situation, without any complaints. Most of the adults I know, myself included, could take a lesson from him.

The Graduate...

Congratulations Mike!

I'm off to Tucson to attend Mike's graduation from the University of Arizona where he's earned a BFA in visual communication with an emphasis in graphic design. Yes, I'm VERY proud of him, and I can't wait to see him.

first Tuesday in January...

So it hit at about 3:30 this morning. Ugh, this is really bad flu (not that there's any good flu). I got up to say goodbye to Alex, Chris and Wiggle, on their way back to Chicago via Kansas City, and to Mike, back to Tucson for his final semester.

I put some laundry in, paid a couple of bills, and picked up a little but now I'm feeling miserable and achy and going back to bed.

The house is very quiet with just me and Ike, and I can't help but miss the commotion of having my family around.

settling in to January...

Wiggle is down for the night; Christo has picked up Mike, and they're spending some quality time together this evening; Alex and Chris are packing to get ready to leave tomorrow. In the meantime, A, Kath, Brenden and the X-man have gotten the bug.

So far, Christo and I seem to have escaped it, although my stomach is rocky...

sickies...

Yesterday I took the tree down and hauled it out front, and yesterday evening we had a simple New Year's Day dinner at my place, complete with hoppin' John for good luck and family fruit cake for desert, we being A, Alex, Chris, Wiggle, Mike, Christo, and me. Mike didn't eat much, as he'd gone out for a late lunch with a couple of his friends in the afternoon. After dinner we sat around the fireplace in the living room and talked into the night, as we generally do when we have the pleasure of each other's company. Mike said he wasn't feeling well, and at about 1:00 AM, he got sick; so sick that I thought he might have food poisoning, except he didn't...at about 2:00, the bug hit Chris, and Alex came down (or rather, got up) with it at about 3:00 AM. For the next few hours it was sort of like a big, bad game of musical chairs with the bathrooms at my place. At 4 AM Christo and I, still well, made an emergency run to 7-11 for Gatorade, and at 7:00 I was up watching Wiggle, who, having been sick on the 30th and New Year's Eve, now apparently feels quite well. At a little before 10:00 Katharina came over and picked up Wiggle, who spent the day with her. Well, that's an understatement: she, Brenden, and Chris took the X-man and Wiggle to The Nasher for the day (first Saturday of the month is family day), after which they took Wiggle back to their place where Kath entertained him, did his laundry, picked up more diapers, and even mended a couple of things before bringing him back this evening. Is she terrific or what?

While she was doing all that, I went back to bed and got some sleep while I could. This evening, the worst appears to be over for Mike, Chris and Alex, who though achy and running fevers are no longer bolting suddenly from whatever room they're in, competing for the closest bathroom. Food is still sufficiently abhorrent for all of them, though, that I went out for a bite to eat rather than risk nauseating them with the scent of any food. I also made a run to the grocery store, where I picked up more Gatorade, Ginger Ale, tea, soda crackers, bananas, and cans of chicken soup with rice. This evening everyone is vegging in the game room in front of the television set, watching movies and grateful to be feeling slightly better. If you have to be sick, it's good to have family nearby.

the way we were...

Late summer of '76, Colorado...Ali was convinced she could drive.

"When a man is tired of London...

...he is tired of life."

I love that quote, from Samuel Johnson, and insofar as I'm concerned, it applies to Boston too. How could anyone not fall in love with this city? It's physically beautiful, and intellectually bustling. The Liberty is the ideal place to stay: within walking distance of The Quincy Market (aka the Fanueil Market), and across the street from the subway, which will take you to Harvard Square in three stops. Yesterday was a beautiful, sunny fall day, with temperatures in the high 60's. After checking in, we walked to The Quincy Market, where we had lunch at Durgin Park, seated outside so we could people watch. Lunch was delicious: slices of gritty, good cornbread to start, followed by clam chowder, a tossed salad, fish cakes to die for, Boston baked beans, glasses of cold Samuel Adams ale and for dessert, Indian pudding with ice cream. It doesn't get any better than that.

We had drinks and dinner with the family in Back Bay last night; we were going to take a taxi but it turns out the Liberty provides a town car between 6 & 8 PM, we availed ourselves of that (very posh!). We had a great time catching up with family, most of whom I hadn't seen in years. We had breakfast this morning in the hotel restaurant, aptly called The Clink: French toast with Vermont maple syrup, sausage, eggs Benedict with a crab cake on the side, fresh orange juice and coffee. Then off to Harvard Square, for the wedding in Swedenborg Chapel. It was a joyous occasion that began with 4 friends of the bride and groom singing "Goin' to the Chapel..."

Afterward, we walked through the rain to Harvard, where we walked around admiring the buildings and ended up, inevitably, at The Coop. Of course we bought books: fiction for A (Under the Volcano); non-fiction for me: Well-Behaved Women Seldom Make History, by Laurel Ulrich, and Daniel Schacter's The Seven Sins of Memory. We also bought souvenirs for the grandsons and a couple of giant Harvard umbrellas. Armed with our giant umbrellas, we made our way to Peet's for some restorative cappuccinos, then back to the subway, where passes are called Charlie tickets. I love that!

Tonight we're off to the lobby for a drink before heading out to the reception.

even Ike...

is happy to have houseguests. More people to scratch him under the chin and rub his belly...life is good...

happiness is...

having your family together, laughing and enjoying the pleasure of each other's company, into the wee hours...

Mike and Brooke got in from Mexico City this evening, and even as I type they're in my living room with Chris, Stephanie and A, sitting around laughing and talking. We sat around the kitchen table earlier, eating pasta salad and talking. I was sitting with them (of course); I'm writing this just before I shut down my computer and turn in for the night...tomorrow's a work day for me, after all...but oh, it's good, always, to have the family together.

anticipation...

Lately, I've not been here much. I've been busy with other things. For starters, about a month ago I realized that I'd somehow acquired a nasty computer virus (Google Redirect). It took me a lot of time to figure out what I had to do to successfully remove that from my computer (it had messed with my registry files), but hallelujah, I finally succeeded, and when I did, I called Mike (who's always been my computer guru) and crowed about it. It seems like yesterday that I was hard put to figure out how to do anything on a computer.

Work has been...interesting. Why didn't I get my license and hang out a shingle? I wonder this at least once a week lately, as anyone and everyone, including my boss, seems to find their way to my cube to vent their frustrations. GENERAL PETRAEUS UPDATE: he asked her for $9800; she saw the light and turned him in to both Match.com and the FBI (or so she says).

But I digress. On the weekends, I've been doing my own usual spring therapy, meaning I've been hard at work mucking about in the rain (thank goodness for crocs!), working on the flower beds in the front of my house, which have needed a major overhaul. I've spent the past several weekends removing the old landscaping timbers (which I'm replacing with edging bricks); digging out tired, old plants and turning the Texas clay soil with a pitchfork, working in peat and sand and bedding soil. And after all that prep and redoing, I've planted cosmos and lobelia; Dahlberg and blackfoot daisies; bleeding hearts and angelonia and impatiens; and weekend evenings I've been listening to music and reading short stories by Salter and having a glass of wine and grilling steaks and artichokes for my dinner.

And all of that is good, but all of that pales beside the happy anticipation of a visit from Alex and baby Silas, who'll arrive in a few hours to stay for a little over a week, while Chris is off to Woods Hole for a conference. And so last night, when I got home from work, I drove to Target, where I bought fresh flowers for Alex and a Pack 'n Play for Silas that I spent some time assembling, so that he (and eventually, his younger sib(s) and cousins) will have a comfortable place to sleep. And tonight I'll have the pleasure of their company: everyone's coming here for dinner except Mike, who'll be sorely missed, but who's promised to come later in the summer. And I think of what an old beau once said to me: that coming to dinner at my house is like walking into the middle of a Woody Allen movie, right down to the dialogue. Yeah. I'm not sure he meant it as a compliment, but I took it as one. And as always, I'm looking forward to it.

Happy Mother's Day!

photo from Google Images

Motherhood isn't for everyone. There are women who would love to be mothers, but for whom, somehow, that does not happen. There are women who have no strong feelings, one way or the other, about motherhood; somoe of them become mothers and some do not. There are women who have no desire to become mothers who end up having children anyway; some of them become mothers who resent their children, but some of them become mothers who fall madly, deeply, in love with their children. And then there are women like myself, who borrow kids before we have our own, just for the pleasure of their company; who always knew that no matter what else we did in this life, being a mother would be a big part of it. This year, both of my daughters are mothers too, and there is a sort of symmetry in that that makes me smile.

For Mother's Day this year I had dinner last night with my youngest son (by 2 minutes), Chris, at my favorite restaurant, Lola. The server, a woman my age, beamed and asked if we were there for a special occasion. Chris smiled and said yes, but before he could say anything else I gushed "Our third anniversary!" Chris burst out laughing, rolled his eyes and said, setting the record straight: "Actually, we're here to celebrate Mother's Day". The server laughed and said that's what she would have guessed, but that she's learned the hard way that it's always best to ask what people are celebrating, and never to assume.

As we ate our excellent meal and discussed a variety of topics, I found myself telling Chris about the time when he was eleven months old and we were camping on top of the Colorado National Monument and he woke up needing to be changed in the middle of the night. We had a pop up camper, and everyone else was asleep, so I picked him up and took him outside. It was a beautiful, warm summer night, with a zillion stars overhead, the milky way cutting a wide and clearly visible swath across the night sky. The stars were so bright that I knew I'd be able to change his diaper by starlight, so I placed a blanket on a picnic table and laid Chris down on it. Then something amazing happened: as Chris lay there, looking up at the stars, he began gurgling and cooing...I swear he was trying to sing; that he was so taken with the beauty of the night sky that he had to try to express himself. It was one of those moments, when it comes to you that this is what matters, and not much else, really.

I don't know how long I stood there, smiling at Chris as he cooed and crooned at the stars. Eventually, I got him into a clean diaper and clean sleeper; then I picked him up and held him close and nursed him, for a long time, under that beautiful, starry night sky.

He laughed tonight when I told him the story. He's heard it before, but he clearly enjoyed hearing it again. He said that at 23, he's not ready to be a father yet (whew! good!), "but there are times, Mom, when you tell a story like this, that I think it must be so cool to have a moment like that..."

Yes, it is. VERY cool.

Coincidentally, this is my 500th post, and I'm glad (and think it's fitting) that it's a post about family.

Happy Mother's Day!

Friday night cocktails...

Friday night cocktails at A's.

Tonight it was my personal favorite, champagne cocktails, and also Bellinis; pretzels with dipping sauces; crackers, brie, and chutney; strawberries dipped in chocolate (which I think are an overrated thing, but then a sweet tooth is not my weakness...bright narcissists are my weakness). A started this family cocktail thing 3 weeks ago, and it seems to be taking off. The formula (open to change, depending on plans, always) is that every 2 weeks or so we (the family, and whomever else anyone wants to invite) meets at one of our houses for Friday night cocktails (2 different types) and accompanying munchies and hors d'œuvre. 3 weeks ago it was Martinis and Manhattans at A's; this Friday, the aforementioned champagne cocktails and Bellinis; in 2 weeks, Chris and Stephanie are hosting; the time after that it's my turn, and so on. Everyone has a couple of drinks, a little food, and a lot of conversation.

Friday night it was A, Francine (a family friend), Chris and Stephanie, Katharina and the X-man, and moi. The X-man, who's 6 going on 36, is tall for his age and gaining rapidly on my own towering 5'3". When he stood next to me I told him I'm pretty sure, judging by his height, that he must be at least 12 instead of 6. That produced a gap-toothed grin. He's lost his two front bottom teeth, and he proudly announced the two front top teeth are loose, too. The X-man had asked ahead of time if Uncle Chris and Uncle Mike would both be there, and what about Aunt Alex, Uncle Chris Too!, and baby Silas? We all wish! But Uncle Mike is in Tucson, busy studying for finals, so he couldn't make it. Uncle Chris Too!, Aunt Alex, and baby Silas live in Chicago, which is a little too far for us to have the pleasure of their company on a regular basis, but later this month, the X-man was assured, Aunt Alex and baby Silas are coming to Dallas for a visit.

As we downed our champagne cocktails and bellinis, the X-man had a chocolate shake, and then proved that the family tradition of being board game geeks continues, as he talked Uncle Chris into playing a rousing game of Trivia Adventure. If you're not a board game geek, this is a 1983 kids' version of Trivial Pursuit. There are 2 levels of questions but they are, of course, now almost 30 years old, which was a hoot in itself. The X-man is bright and reads very well, and the level 1 questions are geared towards kids, so he held his own, but all of us got into it. In response to the X-man asking Chris a level 2 question, "Who was the 6-million dollar man?" (Chris didn't have a clue), Francine and I shouted "Lee Majors!" "No!", the X-man said emphatically, "Steve Austin!" Uh-huh. Lee Majors, the actor, played Steve Austin, the character. That in itself struck me as funny, but I thought I was going to spray Bellini when the X-man read the next card, frowned, muttered, "Uh, this is sort of a weird one..." then asked Chris, "Where does the poop live?"

The answer? No, not the alimentary canal...the Vatican.

Nuff said.

happy Friday the 13th!

Mike and Chris were born on August 13th, and ever since then, I've considered 13 a lucky number, so there's no triskaidekaphobia in my house. Happy Friday the 13th!

A week well spent...

I'm back from Chicago, where I spent a happy week welcoming my new grandson, who, as is evident here, is absolutely beautiful.

at long last...

8 lbs, 7 oz, born at 2:03 PM January 27, 2009

Beautiful, huh? Nevermind that it took him 27 hours to get here...Alex, Chris and baby are fine, and he's here, at long last.

baby update...

I just got word that 27 hours after everything started to happen, she is pushing and all is well! Monkey will be here SOON.

:)